Home birth in Malaga

We planned a home birth in Chilches, Málaga. It was during the COVID-19 pandemic and complete lockdown was just over when Phileine got born. We were able to go outside again, a little bit, at set hours.... We were planning the home birth with two experienced home birth midwives. This was our second child, and we wanted to create the same peaceful, intimate home birth experience we had with our first daughter, Seraphine. Despite the unusual circumstances of the global plandemic. Living in Málaga, we felt fortunate to have access to skilled midwives who supported natural birth in the comfort of our own home.

My pregnancy in Spain during lockdown

My (then) husband and I were eager to have another child and give Seraphine a sibling. During our vacation in Greece, we visited a cave where we made a wish for another baby. I suspected I was already pregnant with Phileine at that time, so I wished for a healthy baby and a beautiful birth.

The pregnancy confirmation came with the familiar onset of morning sickness. Coincidentally, I had just started my HypnoBirthing Practitioner training that same week. Like with Seraphine, I experienced significant nausea and exhaustion until about 18 weeks, which made the training challenging while also caring for my toddler.

The world changed dramatically during my pregnancy. In March, in Spain the lockdown began - Seraphine couldn't go to school, and I started homeschooling her. This unexpected time became precious; I enjoyed seeing what she was learning and watching her motivation to teach me how things should be done. During her school activities, I crafted a wool fairy mobile for the baby, finding it meditative and preparatory for Phileine's arrival.

The lockdown period, while stressful globally, allowed me to focus on creating a peaceful environment for my pregnancy. I consciously avoided stress-inducing news and situations, wanting to maintain the best possible conditions for our growing baby. Everything that could be stressful I completely shut out, even the things going on in my own home.

Although I didn't fully succeed to shut out all stress, I had a pretty good pregnancy otherwise. I was healthy and the little baby growing inside of me was healthy. Since I could not go out for a walk I did yoga at home and tried to keep moving as much as possible within our own garden.

I did go to the chiropractor to help me open up space. This gave me the necessary release in my pelvis and lower back. I feel this helped me a lot. 

Early Labor Signs at 41 Weeks

At 41 weeks and 3 days, I did a relaxation exercise in our small inflatable pool in the bathroom with raspberry leaf tea. Shortly after, I began losing some amniotic fluid. I wasn't overly concerned and simply used a pad, mentioning it to my husband but not yet calling the midwives. Gentle practice contractions also started around this time - light and irregular.

Two days later, at 41 weeks and 5 days, I woke to a beautiful sunny morning with still no significant progress. My husband had set up a small pool next to our swimming pool for Seraphine, where she could play safely in the shade. That morning, I completed some financial tasks, feeling like everything was ready for the baby's arrival - the house was clean, the garden tidy, and our helper was prepared to assist more frequently after birth since we didn't have postpartum care arranged.

When my husband went inside to cook lunch, I sat by Seraphine's pool with my feet in the water, finally allowing myself to relax. The practice contractions had become more regular that morning, though still mild. The moment I truly relaxed, however, the contractions intensified dramatically. When I stood up and felt another strong wave, I knew this was it.

Birth itself in the comfort of our own home

I brought Seraphine inside and lay on the couch, timing contractions that were now coming every few minutes. I sent Seraphine to tell daddy it was serious, though he initially didn't believe it. We all sat down for lunch - I was ravenously hungry and ate a large bowl of pasta with seconds, eating like I hadn't eaten in months. During lunch, my husband called the midwives, who said they'd come at their own pace.

I moved to my yoga ball under the shower, which felt good until I realized I'd flooded the bathroom by sitting on the drain. Seraphine (4,5 years old) stayed by my side throughout, being incredibly sweet - rubbing my arms and back, telling me I was the best mother in the world and doing great, reminding me to breathe properly. Her love and affection were exactly what I needed.

When I bled slightly on the pad, Seraphine worried and asked if everything was okay. I reassured her it was normal, though she had seen birth videos but not bleeding before the baby appeared.

The bright sunlight felt overwhelming, so we partially closed the shutters. When the midwives arrived, they played with Seraphine upstairs, checking on me occasionally. I preferred staying downstairs with my husband, moving to Jack Johnson music playing in the background. I swayed with my arms around his neck, then later preferred leaning on our wooden box, which was the perfect height for hanging and moving my pelvis.

The midwives' presence changed the atmosphere - I could feel a softness, their gentle touch and brief massages helped me relax more, though I found the transitions between their presence and absence challenging. I couldn't verbalize this at the time as I was too internally focused.

I moved between the living room and bathroom, feeling the need to urinate frequently. On one return trip, I caught some contractions hanging from the staircase banister, which felt good. I knew I was transitioning to the final phase and told my husband to inform the midwives I was in transition. They seemed skeptical, saying the contractions looked manageable, but I was certain.

I tried lying on the couch briefly, but the next contraction was so intense I immediately sat up again. As I moved toward the couch where the birthing stool was positioned, I first wanted to be on hands and knees, which felt better. Something still felt in the way. With the next contraction, I pushed as if needing to poop and lifted my bottom - that felt right. Phileine moved, and I felt ready.

On the birth stool (which was lower than I would have preferred), it didn't take many more contractions. The birth stool provided the upright position I needed, though I wished it had been slightly higher. This was essentially a land birth - staying upright and grounded throughout the pushing phase. I felt Phileine moving and turning clearly - a strange but distinct sensation I hadn't been aware of in my previous birth with Seraphine. When the midwives asked if I could still feel movement, I had just felt her turning.

I was deeply connected with Phileine, talking to her internally, placing my hand on my lower belly. The birth felt less automatic than Seraphine's - I remained somewhat observant of myself while being in my own world with the baby. When Seraphine worried about my loud sounds during contractions, I had to reassure her. Later she told me I sounded like a roaring bear, haha. 

The process required more conscious effort from me. My body didn't completely take over, and I couldn't fully surrender to the process. Although I knew instinctively that I needed to more actively nudge my baby down than in my previous birth. No strong pushes or anything, but on the rhythm of my breath I would nudge down with some pressure. The last two or three contractions before her head emerged, I felt she really needed to be born now and I gave a bit more push.

- Now, looking back, perhaps it wasn't necessary to add that extra pressure during the final contractions. But with my experience from Seraphine's birth, where I was told to push harder during the last contractions, I felt compelled to do the same now. During the birth of my youngest child later, I had my partner by my side who reminded me it wasn't necessary and that the baby would be born in their own time. That helped me stay calm and not add extra pressure. That made it a very soft landing without any tearing. -

After her head was born, her body didn't automatically follow - there was a pause before the next contraction, which I briefly didn't understand until remembering this was completely normal. When contractions resumed, she was out quickly. She was here! Born! I could hardly believe it - finally here after waiting so impatiently. Ten fingers, ten toes, completely pink with barely any hair.

Postpartum Recovery After Home Birth

I was overjoyed with Phileine! Our home birth in Málaga had been everything we hoped for - peaceful, intimate, and empowering. She practically crawled to my breast herself and latched somewhat successfully. It wasn't perfect, but she had found the nipple. She was still blowing bubbles from birth and burping a little. I didn't stress about it, thinking proper feeding would come - I suspected she was a bit nauseous from birth, as Seraphine had been too.

The placenta didn't come immediately, but I wasn't worried. The midwives massaged my belly slightly, which I didn't think was necessary but allowed. When I stood and pushed gently, there was a warm, soft relief - quite a pleasant feeling actually. Everything had gone well. I had no excessive bleeding and had just a very small tear. 

With my husband's support, I moved upstairs as twilight began. Contractions had started at 2:15 PM, and Phileine was born around 7:00 PM. Me and my two daughters lay together as a family of three while my husband cleaned up downstairs and informed people of the birth.

Overcoming Breastfeeding Challenges After Home Birth